Discipline

I am not a disciplined creator. Had I been God the world would have taken a lot longer than seven days to make.

I am more of a creative frenzy type. This is true with my art and my writing. I get an idea; a word, a phrase or a picture in my mind and jump in and try to stay above water until it's over.
The last few days my writing has been fueled by a migraine and the medication I took to combat it. ( Think Alice in Wonderland meets William Burroughs)

It sometimes actually hurts when I have so many words in my head-neither my pen nor my computer can keep up with my brain. But it is hard to complain when the muse is whispering in your ear.

I wonder though, what would happen if I set aside a certain time each day to write or to make art?
Would the discipline of that also move me to work? Would I sit there fiddling with pens and paper and mod-podge and get nothing accomplished?

What do you do?

The Fine Art of Compromise

Compromise- b : something intermediate between or blending qualities of two

There is not enough space for me to unpack and have easily accessible all the supplies I like to keep at my fingertips. The space I considered using, ( and believe me, space is limited here) has no electrical outlet and is frighteningly close to the noise of the television.

I need to compromise. I am cleaning a smaller table and placing it in the very small back bedroom, and will choose carefully the supplies I keep at hand. I do prefer things to be just the way I envision them but for now, I have to change my vision.

The use of a small space has me thinking about ACEO's again- small space, small art. So it looks like that is where I will begin. In addition I have several pieces from last year that I should list on Etsy to refuel my shop.

Life, art and loss

Georgia O'Keeffe, In 1923, she said, "One day seven years ago I found myself saying to myself — I can't live where I want to — I can't go where I want to go — I can't do what I want to — I can't even say what I want to … I decided I was a very stupid fool not to at least paint as I wanted to."

I read this quotation yesterday and it is vibrating within me like a bell ringing in my soul. Why? Because I have allowed myself to be trapped, stuck by the behaviors of someone else. There has been little writing, although that is getting better. I have found excuses to avoid yoga for weeks, and creating art? Not a blessed thing.

My husband is an active alcoholic. He was also diagnosed about 7 years ago with cerebral atrophy. Among the directives he received from his doctor were to eat healthy, take vitamins, exercise and avoid alcohol. For a while before we moved back to the island, he adhered to these directives. Over the past two years he has abandoned them all. And he has embraced alcohol with all the fervor with which he used to hold me. He has resisted all my attempts to get him back to the doctor or otherwise help him.

It is impossible to determine and ultimately, unimportant, which is fueling his behavior; the loss of impulse control from the assault to his brain, or the lethargy that alcohol brings. Regardless of the causes, I am dealing with an enormous loss, and the agony of watching him erase himself. It is the antithesis of creating. It is chaos as well as inertia.

However, it is his chaos and inertia, not mine; a difficult concept to remember on a daily basis.

So, although painting is not my metier, I need to create as I want to. I'd been waiting for something to happen before I unpacked my art supplies after moving them out of what was to be my studio and back into the house. But the change is going to have to be created by me.
I no longer have a viable partner in my life. I cannot wait to find a new place to live, wait until my studio is usable, wait until he discovers what he has lost.

So today, I will go to yoga with a friend. I will unpack at least two boxes of supplies, and I will choose 3 poems to send to a poetry contest. I will be my own cheerleader, although I will forgo the pom-poms. And I will continue to pray for my husband.

good tidings

http://thesisterhoodofthetravelingcanvas.blogspot.com/

I am so glad that our canvas was used to raise money for this cause.

A pleasant visit for you

Have you gone over to Girl Gone Thread Wild yet? Do it!

New Work in Progress

torso

flour, water, and glue

strips of paper

2 layers of papier mache


I forgot the pleasure of working with messy mediums. In fact papier-mache is a very relaxing process. I was outside, the sun was high and hot and I could hear the birds in the marsh behind me. Dipping the paper into the mix, smoothing it out, layering it...Distinctly sensual as my friend Robin stated.
Where is this going? I think it is going to be an art book.

So

It is obvious that I have not been creating any art recently. But I have not been lying around eating bon-bons.
Throughout January, February and March I completed a manuscript of poetry. One of my poems was selected as an Editor's Choice in the Allen Ginsberg Poetry Contest and will be published.
I've got another manuscript started and several poems out in the wilds in other contests.
I do have lots of ideas for some art projects and hope to get started on one today.